One might argue that phonology is in something of a crisis period. Phonology seems to be going through early stages of grief for what I see as the failure of teleological, substance-rich, constraint-based, parallel-evaluation approaches to make headway, but the next paradigm shift is yet to become clear to us. I personally think that logical, substance-free, serialist approaches ought to represent our next i-phonology paradigm, with “evolutionary”-historical thinking providing the e-language context, but I may be wrong and altogether different paradigm may be waiting in the wing. The thing that troubles me is that phonologists from these still-dominant constraint-based traditions seem to have less and less faith in the tenets of their theories, and in the worst case this expresses itself as a sort of nihilism. I discern two forms of this nihilism. The first is the phonologist who thinks we’re doing “word sudoku”, playing games of minimal description that produce generalizations without a shred of cognitive support. The second is the phonologist who thinks that everything is memorized, so that the actual domain of phonological generalization are just Psych 101 subject pool nonce word experiments. My pitch to both types of nihilists is the same: if you truly believe this, you ought to spend more time at the beach and less in the classroom, and save some space in the discourse for those of us who believe in something.